It's been a month now since Addison has passed away and there is not a day that goes by that I don't think of her. We are both just taking it one day at a time. It's all we can do. You can't think of why and be mad at god. You just have to have faith that God knew something that we didn't. My faith has just grown through this experience. And if anything I want people to learn not to take their children forgranted. Life is so precious. You never know when your last day might be or your child's last day. We are still parents and probably even better parents than most because we had to choose to give up our baby to stop her suffering. Not most parents our age would be able to make that decision so unselfishness. This experience has just opened my eyes to so many things. We do want to have more children and hope that god blesses us with many healthy children, but Addison will always be our first and she is always a part of our family. I will update this as time goes by. Any comments are welcome. Thanks.
August 12, 2008
Today would have been Addison's original due date. I'm not sure how hard today will be, but I'm ready to get it over with. Jamie and I are going to go get balloons and take them out to the cemetery for her. This is my last week at home and then I am going to go back to work. Mayber that will help me a little to get back to a routine. I still think of her everyday, and miss her like crazy but I know I will see her again someday. And I will be able to hold her in my arms and tell her how much I love her. In case she doesn't already know. She will never be forgotten by Mommy and Daddy. We love you baby girl.
September 8, 2008
I keep worrying that you will be forgotten, not by your mommy and daddy but by everyone else. You have touched our hearts that we will never be the same, but I'm not sure everybody feels this way. It is so hard going on without you. We had so many plans that involved you. You were suppose to have had our first family trip labor day weekend and then just you , mommy and daddy were suppose to go to gatlinburg in October. Just know that everything we do now, you are always with us. I sleep with one of your blankets just so I will feel close to you. We wanted you so much and loved you more than anything before you where even here. I want you to know that when we have other children, they will know that their big sister is in heaven watching down on them and keeping them safe. We miss you so much. We love you baby girl.
October 14, 2008
Tomorrow will be our first October 15th of many, if you don't know what that is go visit the page. We had a doctors appointment October 2nd with the high risk doctors to get tests run, so now I am just waiting on the results. I am hoping to hear something from them this week. Family and Friends joined us last weekend in the March for babies at Paris, Tn and we walked 4 miles and raised $2000. This too will become a yearly thing for Addison's memory. If we can help another family not have to go through we are then we have achieved something. It is a great cause, just wish I knew about it before everything that happened. The doctors are giving us the go ahead though to try again when we feel like it as long as we wait the recommended 6 months because of my c-section. We do plan on trying as soon as those 6 months are up. We don't want people to think that we are trying to replace Addison for she can never be replaced. But we know that the rewards of being a parent even for those 22 days out weighs anything else and we want to experience that feeling again. Many of you are saying that we are going to have twins, that would be great but we just really want God to bless us with a healthy baby that we can bring home and love and tell them all about their big sister and how much of a fighter she was, and how she is watching them from heaven. I am dreading the holidays a little, just because there are so many people in our families that are expecting too and it hurts alittle but I am trying to learn how to deal with it. I know that this is an exciting time for them and am trying to be as happy for them as possible. Well as soon as I get the test results back I will update you again. Take care.
November 27, 2008
Our first major holiday with out our baby. It's very depressing and I have no idea of how I am going to make it through the day. We miss her so much and even more here so close to the holidays. We are gettting ready to make our rounds to all the family members. So I will let you know how it goes when we get back. Wish us luck and pray for us. This is going to be a rough day. We love you and miss you baby girl. You are always on our mind and will never be forgotten. You touched so many peoples lives in those short 22 days. Also you have a new friend up there with you, Watch over him and take care of little Davdon Prince. His mommy & daddy miss him bunches.
December 19, 2008
We have made it through Thanksgiving so now we have Christmas. As much as I would like to skip over the holidays, I know that is not going to help me cope. Baby girl, I miss you and wish so much that you were here with us to celebrate, but I know that you have made many friends in heaven, many whose mom's have helped me get through everything, and you all will be celebrating in heaven with the most beautiful lights and trees and you all will know how much you are loved and missed down here. It doesn't get any easier with each passing day and I often wonder what you would be getting into and how beautiful you would look.We got the information the other day about the March for Babies in Nashville and we are all looking forward to it. More of your family will be participating this time and even your daddy will be walking for you and all your angel friends that were born too early. We will be releasing balloons for you on christmas, so be looking for them and let Matthew and Davdon know that some of them are for them. We all love you very much and miss you everyday. Merry christmas baby girl.
Sept. 11, 2009
It's been quite a while since I have updated this. But thought that I would let you all know that Addison is going to be a BIG SISTER. I know she will be a great one and will always be looking out for her little sister. We have had quite the last few months. I can't believe that it's already been a year since I held her in my arms but she has never left my heart and no one will ever replace her. We are also in the process of closing on a new house. So that is very exciting but scary at the same time. I just hope that we have everything in order by the time that the new baby, Abbigail, is here. She is due Feb 6th.
Love, Mommy & Daddy